I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Randomize
