stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
