You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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