i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
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