Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
