Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
