is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Randomize