this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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