There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
