Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
