she was so not down for the gang bang
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
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