Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I've blown a few things in my day
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize