Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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