Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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