she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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