What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Randomize
