she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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