people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
