id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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