Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

He is such a slut. More and more my type.

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(512): He is such a slut. More and more my type. http://tfl.nu/50vq

Replies (3) Good night (1821) Bad night (577)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Dude, you need to talk to your mom

(724): View more from Pennsylvania

wtf?

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you

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(412): Dude, you need to talk to your mom (724): wtf? (412): She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you http://tfl.nu/71sh

Replies (32) Good night (810) Bad night (4668)
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(850): View more from Florida

You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.

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(850): You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist. http://tfl.nu/9a73

Replies (18) Good night (2196) Bad night (775)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing

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(715): and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing http://tfl.nu/e1xa

Replies (11) Good night (3772) Bad night (1371)
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(317): View more from Indiana

He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death

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(317): He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death http://tfl.nu/foc2

Replies (6) Good night (3409) Bad night (1050)
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(432): View more from Texas

To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway

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(432): To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway http://tfl.nu/h9fr

Replies (8) Good night (3283) Bad night (1148)
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(626): View more from California

HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?

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(626): HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN? http://tfl.nu/rsqz

Replies (51) Good night (6106) Bad night (2271)
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(253): View more from Washington

We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?

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(253): We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this? http://tfl.nu/8b98

Replies (7) Good night (2498) Bad night (1552)
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(281): View more from Texas

seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout

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(281): seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout http://tfl.nu/w9k1

Replies (6) Good night (2524) Bad night (1317)
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(805): View more from California

So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka

(1-805): View more from California

Sweet. Did I win?

(805): View more from California

Youre hungover arent you?

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(805): So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka (1-805): Sweet. Did I win? (805): Youre hungover arent you? http://tfl.nu/l89i

Replies (4) Good night (2882) Bad night (546)
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(816): View more from Missouri

You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"

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(816): You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?" http://tfl.nu/o1ln

Replies (10) Good night (1875) Bad night (669)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.

(1-413): View more from Massachusetts

A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.

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(413): Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens. (1-413): A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck. http://tfl.nu/qib0

Replies (9) Good night (1463) Bad night (623)
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(209): View more from California

... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.

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(209): ... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday. http://tfl.nu/pw31

Replies (0) Good night (309) Bad night (599)
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(775): View more from Nevada

Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.

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(775): Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car. http://tfl.nu/cx3f

Replies (9) Good night (693) Bad night (394)
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(310): View more from California

Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.

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(310): Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley. http://tfl.nu/mbvo

Replies (2) Good night (317) Bad night (619)

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