So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize