It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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