week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
