Tell her she can't have a vagina
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
The struggles of a small town man whore
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Randomize