Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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