I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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