That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
