does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
