it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
