I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
tell me about the eggs
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
