Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize
