Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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