You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
did you just send me my own nude
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
