David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
