I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
