Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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