I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
