i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Randomize
