i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
