she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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