i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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