It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize