the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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