Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
