they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
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