is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
i believe in u and ur pee
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
