i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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