Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
No subtext here. People are naked.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
