hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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