I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I think your dad took our porno
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
